Do Long-Distance Relationships Work?

When you find that one person, the one who you feel connected to, and you love deeply, it’s hard to be apart. But sometimes, life gets in the way, and you have to do a long-distance for a while. It can be trying and demanding. 

In the photo, two people holding hands.

Trust me, I know. 

Being apart from your person can be very challenging for both you and your relationship. Sometimes (not always), you find yourself wondering if your relationship can survive the distance between the two of you

How to make a long-distance relationship work?

Some people tolerate the distance better than others. In my case, for example, long-distance was really hard. I was always wondering what they were doing, if they missed me or not, if they had better fun without me. Having all those trust issues can be really exhausting. For you as well as for the other person. It’s hard to be emotional support for someone, especially when the other person is probably living through the same emotions as you are. It can very well take a toll on your relationship. But it can also make both of you stronger and reinforce your trust in each other. 

So let me reassure you right there. While some long-distance relationships do not work, many of them do. And many people affirm that long-distance helped them be stronger as a couple. 

While all long distance relationships are different, here are some tips and advice on how to stay emotionally connected to your partner while being apart :

Communication in long distance relationships

Communication is important and plays an important role in the success of a relationship. Even more so when you are doing long-distance, in my opinion. You don’t need to be all up in their face (figuratively speaking), but you do need to communicate with them. 

Some couples need to be in contact all day-long, some decide on a certain time dedicated to catching up. It’s up to you, really. 

And don’t forget that sometimes, life gets in the way and plans can be modified. So don’t be too harsh on the universe or your partner in case you can’t speak with them as usual. 

Expectations in long distance relationships

Both of you need to be open about what you expect in this long-distance relationship. As I said, some people are entirely different. If some people live through the distance pretty well, others don’t. So don’t hesitate to communicate about your wants and needs. It’ll be easier, you’ll see. 

Be open about your feelings to your partner

This one is important. It’s always good to remind your partner what you love about them and your relationship. Not that they might forget, but it’s always good to be reminded, especially by the person you love. 

When doing long-distance, some unwanted feelings can come up like jealousy, doubts, anxiety and insecurities. Reassurance can help a lot reduce those sentiments. 

And if you are the one in need of reassurance, don’t be afraid to ask for some. Remember, your partner can’t read your mind, and sometimes they just need a little help to give you what you need. 

Do things together while in a long distance relationship

I know, I know. Doing things together might seem a little complicated when you are away from each other. But with technology, there are plenty of ways to spend time together without actually being physically present.

For example, you can play a video game online, you can watch a TV show or a movie together, listen to the same playlist or eat the same thing one night. Doing things together, or at least the same things, can help increase cohesion in your relationship and reinforce your bonds. 

Set up dates and boost intimacy in long-distance relationships

Being apart can make your relationship feels less intimate. The best way to avoid that would be to set up virtual dates. Do everything as you would being present. Dress up and prepare a good meal. Or whatever floats your boat. But it’ll help boost intimacy and make you feel close to each other. 

Try and visit each other as much as you can 

Visits can be few. Not everyone has the luxury to visit each other as much as one would. But, if you can visit each other once in a while, it can be beneficial. You’ll get to see what their everyday day looks like. 

Plus, the immense joy you’ll feel when you’ll be together again will be much worth it. Nothing else will matter, and you will find yourself completely focus on your person. 

Don’t hesitate to plan the moment you’ll finally be together

Long-distance relationships may seem never-ending. But trust me, they are. And talking about the moment you will finally be together, planning your life together, will help you get through it. It will give you hope that someday, it’ll be over and all the difficulties, the anxiety, the jealousy, the sadness, it will all be worth it. 

Planning your life together can help you assure your place in your relationship when you might feel lost. 

Can I make my long-distance relationship work?

Long-distance relationships can be hard. Sometimes, some couples don’t make it. But some do. When you find time for each other, when you try to understand your partner and what they need, it’s much easier living long-distance. There is a lot of advice we could give you, much like the one in this article. But the real answer to “Do long-distance relationships work” is nuanced. It depends on your own willingness to do what it takes, it depends on people and on their relationship. It depends on a lot of things.

But you can try and maximize your chances with these tips and advice. And trust me, it will be all worth it once it’s over. 

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